Nostalgia

Nostalgia can be a little cruel sometimes…

I just finished a late night of work, and, before bed, I decided to turn on the TV.

I don’t remember on which network it was, but, after thumbing through the channels for a bit, I stopped at an old episode of Frasier that was playing.  I used to really love that program.

My late wife, Brenda, and I used to watch it like all the time.

I didn’t really think about that very thing until the end of the show when the tossed salads and scrambled eggs song came on.  As I sang along (like I always used to), I found myself thinking of Brenda, and, for a moment, I just let myself feel the feelings of missing her presence here next to me.

A week from today (3 June), will be the nine-year anniversary of her death.  Well, given that it's now a few minutes past midnight, techincally, it's only six days of, but who's really counting that closely, anyway?

Anniversaries can be tough for me—you know?—as I tend to be a very nostalgic person at heart.  With each anniversary, I never know just quite how I’m going to feel, but, as I instructed myself a long time ago, I just go ahead and let myself feel whatever it is I feel like feeling.  Some years, I cry like a baby; during others, it's as though Brenda’s last day on earth feels no different to me than the day before last Tuesday.  My heart is still so mysterious to me.  Is yours to you, or am I the only who feels like that?

Anyway, I know I’ve been rambling a bit, and I didn’t really mean to do so.  It’s just that I didn’t expect to be hit by stuff, tonight, you know?

Even though the sting of Brenda’s death departed long ago, I still miss her, and I know that she will always be a part of me.

I know she’s in heaven with God, now, and that all is well with her.  And for that, I am and feel so very grateful.  And she really is well—of this, I am certain.

And—you know?—things are well with me, too.

Brenda...has left...the building...

Yeah...and someday, I will, too.

Thanks for listening, my friends, and for just allowing me a little airtime to let out an old ache for a few minutes.

God’s peace to all'y'all—especially, to those of you, in this very moment, who are feeling something very similar to what I am.

Happiest of Memorial Day Weekends to you...

Bling