Distraction Exhaustion: Experiencing Death and Life in My Doing

If, in your training, you’re not pushing yourself to the point of risking death, you’re probably just going through the motions.—Composite Mentor (CM)

I know this about myself...

In my training, be it physical, spiritual, or mental (it's really all the same), I have not, on a regular basis, pushed myself to the point of risking death.  So, in a manner of speaking, I really have been “going through the motions.”

Has my training been wasted?

No…not at all.  I’ve been training right where I am…and it has brought me to the point where I find myself right now.  And that’s a good thing.

Today is Tuesday, 31 May 2011, and it’s slightly after 5p (EST).  It is my intention to, in this moment, begin to take my training to an entirely new level.  And here’s how I’d like to proceed...

For the next 40 days (from today through Saturday, 9 July 2011), I will push myself to my limits and, once I've reached them, push beyond them.

The manner of “pushing” I'm writing about, though, is, most likely, NOT what you might think.

Rather than pushing myself to pure physical exhaustion, what I want to do is push myself in a little different way.  Quite simply, I want to push myself beyond the limits of my distractions.  To push beyond such limits means to train in such a way that I remain present—and I mean COMPLETELY present and accounted for—not just throughout each training session but throughout each and every single element of each and every single training session.

The practical "practice," here, is this:  When I “discover” or “catch myself” drifting from the state of “just being in my doing” to someplace else, I will, immediately, and with gentleness and humility, bring myself back to the present moment and concentrate on whatever it is I am doing in that moment.

Here's an example of how all of this could play out...

While I do have a global purpose in life to enjoy God fully and, as such, to reflect His glory, when I stand before my heavy bag and prepare to throw a muay thai roundkick, my specific purpose in life in that very moment is to enjoy God’s imminent presence in my life as I throw THAT PARTICULAR ROUNDKICK.  And, in and through the embodiment of my thorough enjoyment of Him, I will, IN THAT PARTICULAR MOMENT, more perfectly and completely, reflect His glory.

Yeah...so THAT's what I'm, talking about—well...writing about.

Again, the premise behind all of this is this:  If I am not completely present in whatever it is I’m doing in the moment, be it breathing, brushing my teeth, interceding in prayer on behalf of another, throwing a lead left, typing the letter “g,” or just listening to the words coming forth from the mouth and heart of a very dear friend, then I’m not enjoying God’s presence fully in that thought, feeling, or action, and that, my friends, is the definition of sin with a “CAPITAL S” in my life.  For me, not fully enjoying God's presence is what it means to fall short of His glory (see Romans 3:23).  By falling short of my complete reflection of God’s glory, I miss the mark of what it means to live as an image bearer of the Most High.  And for me, that’s sin, and I don't want to do that any more.

So...to facilitate such “repentance” and "rethinking" in my life, I will, over the next 40 days, practice pushing myself beyond the limits of that which I allow to distract me so that I might become more fully present in whatever it is I’m doing because then—and only then—will I truly enjoy God and reflect the majesty of His glory to those around me—even if I’m the only one around!

Peace...

Bling

P.S.  For anyone who reads this (and feels inclined), ask me how I’m doing from time to time.  It is my promise to you and to me that I will tell you exactly how I’m doing...and of how I’m both dying and becoming in this "practice" of ever-present-doing.